A Lost Friendship
Once upon a time there was a brunette and a blond with an unbreakable bond. They knew each other since Kindergarten and shared most of their childhood together. They had many movie and dress-up nights, spent hours talking about silly things on the phone, shopped until they dropped and often went to Disneyland and many wonderful plays in LA. They were best friends. After graduating High school together they continued to stay close while one went off to college and the other fell in love and got married. They didn't see each other as often but still kept in touch and always celebrated special occasions. Very slowly the random get-togethers, text messages and phone calls happened less often. Little did the brunette know that the last day she'd see her very best friend was on her twenty-fifth birthday. The blond went to live somewhere much further away and removed most everyone from her previous life. The brunette found out via Facebook when she realized her and her best friend were no longer listed as "friends". To this day (that was almost three years ago) the brunette is still unaware of what happened and was left hurt and frustrated without any explanation. The days and dreams were rough in the beginning but have slowly gotten better. She has done her part in trying to reach out without any success. While she will probably always carry that frustration of the unknown, she has chosen not to have a hard heart against her. For one day if her friend comes around she wants to be there with a hesitant heart but open arms. Because grudges blacken our souls and prevent peace and reconciliation. The days are short and we are called to love, even when someone in our life at times feels very close to an enemy.
Indeed, that is a story about me. I never shared it before because it always felt too recent. In fact, it doesn't even seem like that much time has passed already since I lost my friend. It's also obviously very personal and I left a lot out just to give myself privacy and her privacy if she ever did come upon this. It's crazy how much I still think about her but now I find that sometimes days go by without her ever crossing my mind. I don't not want to remember though. I always want to remember her and everything we did growing up together. She will always be in my heart. Sometimes it's hard though. I'll be dusting the living room and cleaning a particular object that was a gift from her and I ask myself, "What is the point of even keeping this on display? It's not like she cares about me.". I don't know why, but I've left pretty much everything in it's place. In fact, she is still on my speed dial. That I could probably change.
Anyhow, I shared this in hopes that it might help someone else who's reading. If you've gone through a similar situation know that you are not alone and that there are people like you who have been hurt and who have had absolutely no closure, like myself. But I encourage you to make sure your heart does not become hard against that person. God calls us to love our enemies and to treat others the way we want to be treated even if they have done the absolute worst to us. If you feel that person can no longer be a big part of your life or if you need to slowly let them back in, that is absolutely fine. It's different for everyone. But instead of letting the sadness, anger or even hate take over you, try to hold onto the good memories and pray for that person. Think of them the way you used to. And remember, everyone deserves a second chance!
I will end this by saying that I truly believed my best friend would always be there. I pictured us growing old and still talking on the phone and getting together for some shopping and Starbucks. But sometimes there are things we cannot control. It's just life and there will be people coming and going constantly. Make every effort to do your part, let the person know you care and keep in touch - somebody has to be the first person to make a move! Treasure your friends AND your family. Be grateful for the people God has brought into your life and enjoy them NOW.
All images via Pinterest.